Without labeling it as favorites, let's talk about kids for a minute. If you have more than one child you know they are not the same. They are not equal and you do not treat them as carbon copies. As a mother there are certain times when you know you need to tip the scales a bit. Again, not playing a favorite, per se. Just cluing in to a need.
For the last year or so I have made a conscious decision to focus on my third son, my 6 yr old little Jedi. He suffers from a low self image and lacks confidence. Sometimes he is such a little porcupine; not one to be comfortable with hugs, snuggles and affection. I have made his needs a priority for a while and I'm starting to see a change in him, be it ever so slight. I feel like it's my duty to help him climb life's ladder, and that the rungs are very far apart.
I have done things like volunteering to be his room mother in school last year (when I hate doing that stuff) just so he would know he is special. I put his picture as my computer wallpaper for months. I try to look deeper for ways to help him succeed.
This week his teacher sent home a list for their very first attempt at a spelling test. Spelling homework every day and tests on Friday. We diligently worked at it this week and even prayed last night for help to do his best. He just got home and showed me his perfect score! He was so happy and proud! He actually got a bonus word right so it was over 100%.
Baby steps. And the rewards are slow. But things are looking up!
I have "one of those" too. He is my 3rd. He is hard at times. I really have been making an effort to make him feel he is loved. And it makes him shine.
ReplyDeleteI think the harder we try at something.... the greater the reward.
You are such a good mom, You kids are so blessed and someday he will apreciate all that you have done. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteThat is awesome. I love when I can see in my childrens eyes that they know they are loved. You are doing a great job with all of your kids.
ReplyDeleteI wondered if it was a hobo..I'm hoping both of us are wrong though!
ReplyDeletemaybe it is a 3rd child thing. They seem to be stuck and unsure of them selves. Looks like the extra attention is working. He is so dang cute.
ReplyDeleteJen-
ReplyDeleteI was crying when I was reading this post. Every time I see him I just want to scoop him up in my arms and make sure he knows how much we all love him. It's a lot like how my sister used to be. The quiet one, the peacemaker...never letting their own needs be known and kind of fading into the background. I'm sooo glad that with a little help he's coming out of his shell a bit. I learn so many things from you since you're a little further along than I am in the parent chaing and I'm so glad you shared that.